So I am sitting on my couch listening to the song "Here Comes Goodbye" by Rascal Flatts. It makes me think of what will happen in a year. I am joining the army and my MOS is Military Police. So I know once I get out of basic, I will be deployed. Most likely to afghanistan. Its the job I want, and I will be proud to do it. But I am also worried that I wont return home. I know its every soldiers fear but thats just my luck. And honestly its kind of depressing because I don't have much to show. I don't have a boyfriend, a husband, or any children. I mean I am still young, and stuff and that is why I am joining. I am hoping the army will help me find my path in life. Cause right now I just feel stuck. It really gets me down at times.
Depression sucks. I get depressed because I am bigger, so I eat. Then I get depressed that I am eating so I eat more. haha I will never drop the weight I want to before I leave. FML! ...I need motivation. Anyone willing to help?
Tomorrow I am going to start something new... find old pictures of me when I was skinnier, and post them every where, so I get so motivated to look like that that i have NO CHOICE! ha Yep thats what I am going to do. hahahaha Think it will work?
My work schedule just sucks so bad. Its 3 to 1130, so I really dont want to get up early and go work out. Maybe I should. I kind of want to run late at night while no one is out, but then I am afraid to get kidnapped. lol So yeah I am kind of stuck. ha ha Maybe if I had a jogging partner. But then they would have to live kind of by me. Ugh! See I am just fucked all around.
I am pretty sure alot of people are doubting I will join the army. But my mind and my heart are really set on this. This is my dream. And I am not marrying into it anytime soon, sooo I will be joining. I guess what it really depends on is the guy I might be dating, if I get pregnant, or something like that. My mom supports me. I haven't really talked to my dad about it. I really need to. My mom actually met my recruiter at the state fair. ha He was running the Army booth. I swear my mom was going to cry while she talked to him. Well I better get to bed... enough writing for tonight.
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Hey Katie, I think we should start a routine before it gets cold or I move to california whatever comes first... but we should wake up a little earlier and meet a grays to go for a walk/jog. It's very tiring but once you get started you feel good for the rest of the day... let's think about it.
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